I really thought I had found a solution to poor sleep following a night shift, a hot milky drink with a few pages of my book before trying to go to sleep. It was tremendously successful on my last run and seemed to work following my first shift on Sunday. Slept like a top, waking refreshed and ready for action at around four o'clock in the afternoon.
Sadly it wasn't as effective following Sunday nights shift as I tried to sleep during Monday in preparation for my final one. Tossed & turned all day and eventually admitted defeat at two o'clock'ish. Getting up I didn't feel right, I knew I wasn't at my best as the temptation to pull a sickie was great. Despite my significant moaning and protest, predominantly I realise you have to take your medicine and just get on with it. But I just couldn't find that little pouch of reserve to hold on.
I slouched in front of the tele, just about got myself together for the shift, but my heart wasn't in it ... and neither was my body it seems. Throat got sore, sniffles increased, I just felt *blaaa*
I kept going through my shift; pulling a long forgotten, aged and battered Lemsip from my bag kept me numb for an hour or so. Regular iced drinks and a ice lolly* helped to numb my throat for a short while. But as the night progressed I just felt worse and worse. Staffing numbers are so poor that you can't really embrace or cover a member of staff departing mid-shift, especially on a night however ill they maybe.
So I just had to hang in there feeling rather pathetic and sorry for myself. Even verbalising that I wasn't at my fighting best were greeted with surprise. "But you're never ill!!!"
I even got sent for a break mid-shift, and I went. Which was greeted by equal surprise "But you NEVER go for a break!!!"
Lying in a darkened cubicle I still felt guilty despite being entitled to a forty-five minute break each night. If I added up all those night shifts that I have forgone a break and claimed the time back I'm sure I'd ultimately be very close to retirement?
When I started nursing you were made to go for a break during the night, irrespective of whether you wanted one or not. I clearly recall lying on discarded soft play items, dozing briefly and then feeling horrible for the remainder of the night. That little night doze would all to frequently jeopardise the quality of my day sleep.
Even when I did sleep, hard to avoid when lying on padded apparatus in the pitch black, I use to wake up so disorientated and confused. Which amused my colleagues greatly, but left me feeling horrible.
Eventually I put my foot down and simply declined preferring to endure the shift straight through. Even so I do feel a little robbed of all those hours I have given the NHS for free.
As I get older staying awake has become harder, night shifts really are a young persons game. By my mid-thirties when things did quieten I tended to suddenly droop, my head would drop and I'd doze. Again to the significant amusement of my colleagues.
*Solario ice lollies available in the vending machine in the canteen, who knew? It did seem ironic that you could get a whole range of microwave meals, Danish pastries and ice creams, but the usual vending machine fare (sandwiches, cans of pop, etc) were absent. The girls reported that it was most amusing to come across me sitting at the main nursing station eating an ice cream at three o'clock in the morning.
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